Prepping for a Profile …

If you’re like me and would rather get drunk and online shop from home, but love the appeal of well-worn vintage clothes, then people that actually scour the racks for you become something special in the quest for the perfect wardrobe. And online etsy shops really provide the best of both worlds.

Emily Bolles from Sturnelle Collection has graced the ‘pages’ of this blog before, and tomorrow, I aim to add another favorite online fashion  forum to my repertoire with a visit to the pop-up shop event for MILKMONEY. I’m bringing Jimi along with me so we can get good and sauced and find all our favorite pieces to gush about on this here blog.

Check them out now or wait for my profile, but either way, let’s hear it for the girls – the local Portland girls especially – that love fashion so much they’re willing to go out and find it for me. xoxo, Lou

1529972_725222147497252_1957469975_o[1]

Getting Wild … with Western Wear

I have something to admit. I can’t stop watching this terrible reality show called ‘Rodeo Girls’. For those of you that know me this shouldn’t come as a huge surprise. I’ve wanted to be a barrel racer in the rodeo since I was about 8 years old. But because I wasn’t born into the rodeo circuit and never had money for my own horse and had to navigate the cards I was dealt (suburban Minnesota), it just hasn’t happened for me.

So instead I’ve done things like spend a summer in Wyoming working on a dude ranch, horse lessons, volunteer work with horses, and annual promises to myself to save up for my own horse. I also very frequently fall into fashion obsessions with Western wear. Lucky for you and me, western wear has actually gotten really COOL. As a little girl, I really only understood it as shit I could find at like Drysdales. No this isn’t necessarily bad, but it’s not something I’m going to wear around the streets of Portland either.

unnamed-3

Seriously though. Those brown pants. That SHIRT. That shirt got a lot of play back in the day, no doubt.

little lucy

 

And absolutely nothing has changed. 

30079_534804530948_4214898_n

 

That’s me dude-ranching it and if you want a real trip, check this out http://lucyontheranch.blogspot.com

But back to real time, like I said, I was sitting on the couch ignoring the beautiful, sunny Portland day outside, watching Rodeo girls and I looked down and was like oh snap, this flannel I’m wearing sure is cute and appropriate. Flannels. Wardrobe staple. They make everyone look hot! Cholo/as need I say more? And a girl in an oversized flanned, don’t tell me that doesn’t turn you on. 

unnamed

 

Me today in a not oversized flannel, but it’s still cozy as hell and it automatically makes my un-makeupped, crazy hair, tired eyes situation seem less dire than it actually is. Scored this one from a clothing swap. Long live clothing swaps forever and ever. 

Then I got to thinking about this sweatshirt I recently got from Idylwild. I was pretty drunk when I saw it and realized I had to have it, but you know, I’m sober now and not regretting it at all. Idylwild has tons of cute shit. Follow on IG and check out the website and stock up on staples that will get you through summer because seriously I’m thinking short shorts, cowgirl boots, and turquoise. All day every day come June.

unnamed-1

Cute, right? 

Here’s some more Idylwild pulled from Instagram:

unnamed-2unnamed-5unnamed-6unnamed-3unnamed-1

Another good site and IG to check out is Bandit Brand clothing.  Hotttttttt shit. 

unnamed-7

 

And for all your jewelry needs, I HIGHLY suggest you check out Honey Fox Jewelry because SWOON. I recently got a new job and one (at least) of her pieces is top of my list for first paychecks.  And she’s local. If anyone wants to gift me with something of hers I won’t complain. Here’s her Etsy for all your shopping and gifting needs http://www.etsy.com/shop/honeyfoxjewelry

unnamed-8 unnamed-9 unnamed-10 unnamed-11

 

So yeah, I don’t know about you, but now that we’re past the winter solstice I’m already dreaming of summer and it’s going to include horses and western wear galore. Oh and I’m thinking a return trip to Wyoming. Road trip anyone? 

unnamed-2

 

xoxo, yeehaw, Lou

 

I Didn’t Die and I’m Not Sober

I just have been taking an unscheduled hiatus from writing for no good reason. Sometimes maybe those are the best types of breaks. Then I had someone somehow find me on Instagram and she loved the blog and I woke up this morning and literally jotted down a random poem first thing and remembered why I ever kept this blog in the first place and that was so that I could continue writing on a daily (or to be real – weekly) basis.

This is something I have not been doing and it kind of sucks. So maybe I should write … about … island life? Island fashion? Since I am coming off a 2 1/2 week vacation in Thailand and spent every day looking something like this:

IMG_6793

Ridiculous right? First rule – buy flowy pants immediately. Those pants are the most amazing pants maybe ever and everyone should find their country’s alternative. They’re high wasted, have pockets, keep you cool even in 90 degree weather, have elastic ankles for beach walking, and dry quickly. I gifted a group of my girlfriends with them and now they love me forever. This elastic waist makes me want to cry with happiness, especially because when you’re in the tropics it’s totally acceptable to rock an elastic waist at all hours of all days.

unnamed-2

Let’s see. What else? I really, really wanted to buy an entire wardrobe for this trip because you know – of course I was imagining all the pictures we’d be taking and I had an idea of what I wanted to look like in those pictures, but in the end I took a bunch of hand-me-downs and cheap second hand finds because that’s the only way I know how to operate in fashion.

Don’t be afraid to pack light. 

Everything I took had to fit into a Jansport backpack since we had no itinerary and no plans and needed to be highly mobile. Therefore, I wore the same 5 outfits over and over and over again. Luckily the clothes you need for island fashion are small and compact. This was the warmest thing I had to wear and it was only necessary for the plane rides over there:

IMG_6199

Hi cleaning lady! After this shot, it was was bikinis, dresses, bikinis, dresses, and one radical pair of jean shorts:

IMG_6335

My sister gave me this dress and she got it from GAP for $10. You don’t need to wear a bra with it, the back has cute detail, it’s a great color, was a little longer than the other dresses I had, and the cotton is breathable – if you’re going somewhere tropical – a dress that meets these criteria is a must.

Oh and I don’t typically wear flip flops during normal life, but on this trip I lived in them, especially since it’s customary around Thailand to remove your shoes whenever you go into … well most places, not to mention the beach. For me, it was either this pair of slim black Havaianas  or Vans, which should have the laces ripped out of them immediately for slip-on access.

unnamed-2

White dress from Buffalo Exchange for $13 or so bucks. Perfect cover up.

IMG_6398

This dress is from Victoria’s Secret, who believe it or not, actually have a shit ton of cute beach stuff. This was you know cute enough and it’s made from some sort of terry cloth so it’s suuuuper comfy and it has a drop waist which is bitchin BUT I wore it on a boat trip and it started raining and then I was pretty much wearing a heavy wet towel, so I mean maybe not my best move ever … definitely should have had on this RVCA poncho thing I bought specifically for this trip through Revolve (who I love for their free shipping/returns/selection), but I am an idiot and definitely forgot to pack it. Fabrics matter.

IMG_6889

Anyway I’m rambling so let me sum this up.

  • I need to write more.
  • Tropical vacations kick the ass out of everything and flip flops are a totally acceptable form of footwear when you’re on one.
  • Cover-ups and bikinis are your best friends. I bought all new bikinis on crazy cheap sale from Victoria’s Secret OH AND one ridiculously expensive pair of bottoms from Frankie’s Bikinis. Trust me, if you have any sort of substantial booty the Venice bottoms are your best friend. Worth the money if you want to preserve shots of your hot young ass in Thailand.
  • Don’t wear materials that turn into heavy towels when they get wet. Fabrics matter.
  • Don’t be afraid to pack light, especially if you’re going to a place where it’s inexpensive to purchase forgotten necessities.
  • Buy flowy pants immediately. Bonus points if you can make an elastic waist pair work for you.
  • Tropical drinks are mostly overrated unless they are Mango Margaritas. Cheap whiskey and beer with fresh fruit snacks are where it’s at.

And that’s all. Until next time, which hopefully won’t be as long as this last time.

xoxo, Lou

Work, B*tch

My sister is stepping in to do a guest blog. Isn’t it cute how she *’s out the “i” in Bitch in her title? Ha – I think she forgot she was writing for my crass, whiskey-saoked blog. Goes to show that we have pretty different, ok … very different styles. Some of you are a bit more classically stylish like she is though, so I always love when she gets a chance to write.

It’s pretty funny she’s the one that’s blogging and that she’s blogging about work, seeing how I’m currently unemployed and technically should have all day to write, but instead I’m … looking … constantly … for jobs. Or watching The Voice. So you know. 

I hope you enjoy this post by her. Especially if you work in an office environment where business casual (is that what this is?) is the way to go. Me? I only find myself looking for jobs now where I have the freedom to wear whatever I want. I’ve been spoiled and won’t ever back! 

Enjoy! Happy Monday! xoxo, Lou

When I first started my office job in the fanciest building on campus at my alma mater, I was Jazzed about wearing Office Clothes. Visions of me dressed like this were dancing in my head:

jcrew suit

Sometimes, I’m not far off this mark. BUT, suits are crazy expensive, and one can only come up with so many clever combinations of suit-top-heels before one gets a little bored with office attire. After only a short time at my office job, this is how I felt about wearing office clothes:

Photo on 9-16-13 at 9.52 AM #2

As previously mentioned, I work in The Fancy Building on campus. The university president works in this building. There is definitely a dress code. (Side Bar: We have actual Casual Fridays and people really do say “T.G.I.F.!” It can make life feel a lot like a quirky sitcom.)

Needless to say, I’m on the younger end of the employee spectrum, and most people in the building tend to walk the conservative line when it comes to work wear. So I realized I had two choices: Fall into the same habits of my coworkers, and try to blend in, OR, be true to myself and my love of clothes, and have as much fun as possible within the parameters of Looking Professional.

I never thought I’d be a Blazer Girl. But I LOVE My Blazer. Investing in a great Blazer is so worthwhile when you need to wear Work Clothes on the regular. It polishes up any ensemble, for example:

Photo on 4-2-13 at 12.48 PM #2

Without the blazer, that outfit is super casual. It’s a cotton turtleneck, relaxed-fit skirt, and some booties. But add the blazer, and voila! Polish.

Another great work staple is the Pencil Skirt. I commute by bicycle most of the time, so this item is reserved for carpool days. Be Forewarned: pencil skirts have a volatile magic. You will probably not open a single door for yourself all day, but it’s likely because the door-holder is enjoying the view:

photo (9)

It’s easy to fall into Pin Up Girl territory here, so pairing the magic skirt with a simple cotton top and cozy shrug gives it some balance.

Speaking of inappropriate office outfits, I’m pretty sure this dress was way too short for me to wear to work:

Photo on 7-26-13 at 2.03 PM

I wore that white cardigan over it and somehow decided that made it more modest, but looking at this picture I’m kinda surprised I didn’t get sent home to change. Hello, legs!

Which is not to say that dresses in general can’t be Work Appropriate. Do you have a spirit animal? I do, and her name is Taylor Swift. One morning Swifty ran into some Joan from Mad Men inspiration to create the following work outfit:

photo (10)

I really wanted to wear the Ray Bans all day, but they made it hard to see my computer screen.
T-shirts can also make for a good work ensemble, so long as you apply the requisite Polish.

Example One, The Tee / Cardigan Layered Look:

Photo on 3-15-13 at 11.19 AM #3

Photo on 3-8-13 at 9.05 AM

Example Two: The Button Down / Tee / Cardigan Combo:
(I have no clue what I’m doing in this picture, but I like my outfit)

Photo on 11-28-12 at 8.16 AM #2

It’s important for my office steez to be bicycle friendly whenever possible, so I’ve invested in a lot of good Pants over the last year and a half.  The goal is always slim cut, ankle or capri length, for the ease of hopping on the bike to G-O! These wine colored gems are one of my new favorite pairs (shown with a little daytime sparkle!):

Photo on 10-3-13 at 11.04 AM #2

Photo on 10-3-13 at 11.04 AM

I also decided awhile back that toothpick cords are completely work appropriate, and no one has ever contradicted me, so:

Photo on 10-21-13 at 9.22 AM

(you better work, b*tch)

Clearly we must now segue into Sweaters. It’s fall, and I love sweaters. Let’s enjoy this one again:

Photo on 10-21-13 at 9.23 AM

This is what I’m wearing today, and so many people have commented on “the chicken” on my sweater, to which I can only reply, “Chickens don’t wear berets.”

Remember how we have actual Casual Fridays? Well you still don’t want to look like a hot mess, especially when your university prez is on the TLC tip. He don’t want no scrubs.

Casual Friday Example One:

Photo on 8-30-13 at 9.29 AM

Photo on 8-30-13 at 9.31 AM

The shorts were a gamble, but the polish here? Oxfords and a cute, simple sweater. Nautical theme!

Casual Friday Example Two:

Photo on 8-9-13 at 12.26 PM

Jeans and some school-spirit red plaid, with more oxford polish.

See? Dressing for work can be – and should be – fun. Even if your office has Professional Polish Parameters (yay, alliteration!) there are always opportunities to be creative. Find your spirit animal and let her shine! Then, if your sister has a fashion blog, you can take lots of mini work breaks by creating a catalog of outfit selfies which will one day become a What to Wear at the Office post. Cheers, Lou!

I Did Something Crazy

To many of you, it’s not that crazy, but I bought two pairs of shoes in like, the last month. Whoa.

You see – I finally have a job that pays me an amount of money that allows for expendable income. It’s completely exciting. Up to now, my wardrobe consisted of hand-me-downs, swap steals, the occasional thrift find, and cheap ass shit.

I still really appreciate all of the aforementioned sources of appropriation, but to finally have money that I can spend to build a closet with wardrobe staples that are entirely ME is pretty damn fun. Plus I’m almost 30. Now that the college degrees are out of the way and I scored a great job, it’s time I buy myself some of my own damn clothes, right? (See, I still have to ask as I try and rid myself of the weird feelings of guilt over spending my own money. Being formerly poor is weird like that.)

So anyway, I bought shoes. I’ve always had a hard time buying shoes. Because with shoes, unlike with say, sweaters or leggings or whatever, you can’t get by on “cheap” as easily. I’m still am not spending a fortune or anything, but let’s consider spending more than $45 on a pair of Vans a step up.

Pair #1 – Doc Martens 

Yeah, yeah, I get it. The dream of the 90’s is blah blah blah … but let’s be real here. This fashion phenomena is not just hitting Portland (it just never left Portland) and I would way rather walk around seeing 90’s fashion flashbacks everywhere than say, the 80’s. The 80’s are just not my steez.

photo-2

 

I’ve been talking about how I just really need some new boots. In Portland, where it’s rainy and cloudy for 9 months of the year, investing in boots is kind of a must. Just so happens that for the past year or so I’ve also been swooning over Doc Martens. Especially those Oxblood red numbers.

So here I am, walking to work the other day, in a pair of flats with no socks or anything, and it’s pissing rain and I’m like MAN I really need some BOOTS. The time is NOW. And then I see the Dr. Martens store as I cross Burnside and I’m like, mmmm Dr. Martens.

And then bam! It hits me. Duh. Dr. Martens are fucking BOOTS. Going to look on my lunch break can’t hurt, right?

photo-1

 

Best purchase I’ve made in a long, long time. Practically wore these puppies out of the store. And I went with black knowing that if I loved them (which I do) I could always go back and pick up a pair up in Oxblood. Black is more a staple item. And that’s my thing with what I’m actually willing to spend money on – collecting staples.

 

Item #2 – Phew. Deep breath. Jeffrey Campbell Soiree Heels

Ok, ok. What the fuck was I thinking? Who am I? Will I ever where these?

I don’t know the answer to any of these questions – well except the last because yeah – I have to wear these. I’ve had my eye on them for a few months now. Mainly because I saw this girl’s picture over on her tumblr The F Word (follow her – she’s too fucking cute) and was like damn. Give me those.

tumblr_m89rhaqrL51r6sxxno1_500

 

Then. Well. They went on sale. At Urban Outfitter of all places. And I got an email saying SALE SALE SALE. You know?

And then I was like, well it can’t hurt to click the link and look, right? WRONG.

It hurt my bank account. But only by $87.50. Which, for these … not bad. And now I own a pair of nice heels! They’re different and edgy, sure, but they’re also a really classic silhouette when all the trend is stripped away. And I stray pretty far from straight up classic fashion aesthetics. So, it was meant to be. I just … I had to splurge.

photo

 

Sorry I’m not sorry.

I’m still crafting my perfect first outfit with them, so you’ll have to wait for that :) TBC …

Until then – don’t let me buy anything else! Unless I’m buying it in THAILAND!

xoxo, Lou

 

Get Your Hands On Some DEAD THINGS

Guess what, bitches?! It’s October. Which means I should spend the entire month talking only about spooky fashion, right? Because I don’t do that enough already.

Well, here’s a special one for ya. A longtime reader of CWPL, Miss Sarah Moeding, got in touch with me a few weeks ago because SCORE, her beautiful, hand-crafted jewelry is now available for sale on her Etsy site. Guess what it’s called?

Dead Things By Sarah.

afterlight

I mean, COME ON. Not only are her pieces perfect for yours truly on a year round basis, they also happen to be seasonally appropriate for those of you looking to delicately tap into your dark side.

1376376_746148968733907_518884306_n

And that’s just it. These pieces manage to stay delicate and pretty, without sacrificing their edge. I played around with a couple pieces to see how they would look with my favorite color – black, as well as with some more feminine ensembles too, just to demonstrate the versatility of her work. As she describes it, her aesthetic is “Victorian Hunting Lodge”. If that doesn’t drive home the juxtaposition, I’m not sure what will.

photo-2

photo-1

She made her first bone brooch from some mink skeletons her sister gave her for Christmas in 2009 and has always been fascinated and collected “dead things”. Her sister remains supportive of her hobby and to this day collects bones for Sarah and thinks of her when she sees dead stuff… (I really like this since my family has the same special connection with me. They LOVE it …ahem).

1173753_507361409340481_1610143757_n

So anyway, Sarah began by making the pieces mostly for herself and for her friends, but as she tells it, “only in the last couple of months have I started to branch out into making earrings and necklaces, and selling them to the public. It’s exciting, the response has been resoundingly positive and supportive, and I took part in a craft fair mid-August that found me selling about a dozen pieces in less than a few hours.”

1375153_523632534380035_2571820_n

Fuck yeah! If you read this blog on a regular basis, you know I’m all for supporting talented, hot babes in their creative endeavors. Sounds like Sarah’s is really taking off. Must be in part because her unique pieces “straddle the line of being pretty and even ornate, but also somewhat masculine in form and feeling.”

afterlight-1

Aside from that balance in her work, I also really love the uniqueness of her jewelry. I mean, come on. My mink bone is from my very own little mink! No need to share this little guy or gals curvature with anyone else. All mine!

afterlight-2

afterlight

If you want to really GO FOR IT when placing your order – she also offers gift wrapping for like, major cheap. Which is TOTALLY worth it because look, just look (genuine, bonafide, Texas armadillo skull not included):

afterlight-3

(genuine, bonafide, Texas armadillo skull not included)

Now how cute is that? And that is a box you can keep forever. Even if you buy a piece for yourself, I vote you still go for the gift wrap. You won’t be sorry when you get this little package in the mail that is so evidently prepared with care and artistry. I know that I was really gleeful as I unwrapped my goodies and I have no doubt you will be too.

Photo on 9-30-13 at 6.56 PM #2

There are a ton of ways to get in touch with Sarah and places to check out/purchase her treasures:

She has a really great selection of pictures showcasing her work on her Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/objetsdelamort

Ready to buy? Etsy site is where it’s at: http://www.etsy.com/shop/DeadThingsbySarah

Questions? Custom Orders? Fan Mail? Email a girl: deadthingsbysarah@gmail.com

And let the countdown begin … 30 days to Halloween! Send me all your spooky post ideas. Please and thank you.

Oh and a very special thank you to Sarah! I fucking love my readers … Now go check out her steez stat.

photo

xoxo,

Lou

Hey – You Want To Win Some MYKITA MYLON Glasses?

When I first met my best friend Jessica (you may also know her as JRa, Jess, JJ, etc), I had no idea that fashion in the optical world was such a ‘thing’. I thought expensive sunglasses were ridiculous and people that wore glasses, well, I just didn’t think much of the fact that they had been needing to pick out an accessory that I myself had been able to ignore my entire life.

380761_609070735878_320585425_n

Me and Jessica – the early days (RIP Murder – my fishy)

After three years of bosom buddiness though, that’s all changed. I’ve helped her a number of times at Optik PDX, the small, beautifully designed, startup shop she helped bring into existence along the hip stretch of Mississippi that also houses Mississippi Studios, Miss Delta, Interurban, etc. etc.

269105_232002853489754_6899368_n

She played a major role in introducing me to my adorable, glasses-wearing boyfriend (who, btw, shelled out for a surprise pair of the most amazing Barton Perriera sunglasses for me about a year ago, which ended up convincing me spendy shades were a worthy investment).

And, she has no problem pointing out the countless, COUNTLESS, number of glasses she herself has designed all around Portland. There is no shortage of people with fashionable eyewear in this town let me tell you. Check out the Optik PDX Facebook page to see some of them!

So yeah. I am surrounded by glasses now. Never saw myself in this situation, but that’s the way the cookie crumbled. And these days I’m up on Mississippi way more than I ever used to be and I’m always stopping in to see her and to say hi to the amazingly genial Dr. Ezra, and oh yeah to help myself to a nice cold Widmer, which they keep fully stocked in the back room for their customers to enjoy while perusing all the fabulous frames.

8488_535641706459199_76014760_n

The Optik team looking all sorts of precious. 

281533_232002796823093_4801033_n

Inside the boutique

This isn’t just your typical adoration post even though I do indeed love her and Optik PDX to death. I actually have something really rad to tell you about! Let me get to the point. Aside from setting people up with all their optical needs, they also throw a killer party.

This Thursday is no exception. Please watch the video below where super smart people make 3D stuff using plastic and lasers. There is this glasses line, MYKITA MYLON, that is made like this.

971240_10200682625202572_1888884914_n

Jess looking hot in the Mylon line

They’re bendy! They’re strong! They come in the most incredible colors and are like, super crazy hip. And this Thursday, Optik PDX is having a trunk show to showcase all the sexy steez. But oh wait there’s more, they’re also having a contest where you could actually win a pair! It’s an Instagram contest obviously, but that just means it’s super easy to enter.

1186000_591273077562728_71221993_n

Hello, beautiful frames

I’ll be posting the Instagram contest rules later today or tomorrow so watch for those. And if you live in Portland, do yourself a favor and head over to Optik PDX  this Thursday, September 12 (TOMRROW!). The party goes from 1:00 – 7:00 pm and will feature a photo booth, free beer, beautiful people, and a whole host of cool glasses to fawn over.

0-Mykita_Mylon_09122013

See you there babies!

xoxo,

Lou

Dying Over These Swim Suits …

Ok whoa whoa whoa hold up. To begin, thank you dear reader, Alyssa, for bringing this to my attention. 

Second, let me just say … Decaykini. Hellkini. Slasherkini … no no, you read right. It IS what you’re thinking. Only better. And brought to you by Etsy purveyor Bloodlust Productions.

il_570xN.445877828_hi42

 

I just … 

il_570xN.391446382_rorj

 

You think these bikinis would be absolutely perfect for me! I mean, there isn’t much more in this world I love more than horror and creep stuff, but I am just not sure that I could put this type of stuff on my VAGINA. Not even if it is made from fucking rad ass horror effect materials and inspired by all of my favorite types of spooky shit. 

I haven’t even given you my best example … ahem. 

 

il_570xN.484049676_904w

 

Look how hyped and sexy that girl is – now look between her legs. I die.

 

il_570xN.449139323_618e

 

…………

 

………..

It is very … metal. 

And honestly, I am obsessed with the concept and the execution. The shit looks really well made and I got a sewing machine solely for the purpose of making a line of “Murder Skirts” (hitting a retailer near year you, Fall 2019), so obviously I’m into it. It’s just so fucking ludicrous and weird and gnarly and really just, drives me to awed speechlessness. 

Please, please go check them out and if you buy anything, you HAVE to send me pictures immediately. Because these suits really are pretty fucking epic. 

il_570xN.445877066_c8xd

 

Like, there’s texture … 

il_570xN.484048136_299g

 

And most of them will only set you back $85 – $100.

OMG their skirts! Their masks! Yeah I said it … skirts!!! 

il_570xN.358700401_p7ms

 

It’s too much. I’m obsessed. I pray to the Antichrist I see someone wearing something from these folks someday. 

Again … go check them out, especially if you’re anything of a horror geek like myself. Swim suits are made to order. That’s pretty legit.

xoxo, 

Lou

 

Never Shop Sober

God DAMNIT! How many of us know I suffer from buyer’s anxiety? Well if you don’t know, now you know.

I think this is obviously a direct result of all my years being a broke ass college student and all the subsequent debt I’ve accrued. These days I’m afraid to buy anything unless it’s wrapped in a tortilla or comes served in a bar glass. Which is why I still look to my sister for hand-me-downs and strive to be a better thrifter and constantly look at my sewing machine and lament the fact that I still have not mastered its capabilities.

But I think I found a cure to this shopping induced stress … find something that stresses me out more.

I got a new job. Yay! It pays me more money. Yay! I’m hella fucking stressed out about the change and the newness and the unknown and so last night it was easy – too easy – for me to drop $100 on clothes I don’t really need all while DEAD SOBER.

Every time I wear the below dress, shoes, or pants … I am going to think of fear and nothing else. Haha ok so probably not, but dang. Is this a step forward or a step back? I can’t tell.

P1050732t

 

JuJu Jellies

In my defense I have been thinking about buying these for months! I keep seeing them on my Instagram feed and admire them and blah blah and I’ve seen them sell for $60 and I think I bought these for $50 and low and behold that $10 off was all I needed to feel completely and finally justified in making my purchase.

Very tempted to follow these up with JuJu Petra  in bronze and JuJu Vicky in green or pink or something. Will hold off for next wave of anxiety to hit.

Um, this 90’s dress.

27932417_041_b

 

Whatever. It was on sale and has a really cute zipper up the back. Daisies. I can’t believe I bought something covered in daisies.

Oh and then I got some really cute high-waisted skinny jeans that I just now read about while searching for a snapshot. Apparently they run very small … so I probably botched that purchase. Obviously! The entire thing might be botched. I might be sending it all back. Probably not, but point is, the takeaway here is that had I had booze, I probably would not have paid for this stuff.

Never shop sober. Got it.

xoxo, Lou

Poll Time: Snail Slime on Your Face, yay or nay?

Awhile back … a way while back, I did a poll on fish pedicures. Click Here to see.

Most people were into it! A whopping 46%.

29%, including yours truly said no, fuck off. For some reason it really skeezes me out. All that dead skin …

And 25% said they might consider it depending on their level of sobriety.

So ok, how about this one: snail facials.

First off, they prices are fucking steep. $100 for 5 minutes? Those snails better be shitting gold all over my skin, you know?

Second off, it looks gnarly.

snail-face-670x440-130714

Before I poll you, you have to go to bbc.co.uk. and watch the video. Thems the rules.

Done? Ok now tell me:

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 64 other followers