Blue Lip Beauty Experiment

Someone commented over on the ol’ Facebook page about trying out blue lipstick.

I’m not sure when blue lipstick became a thing, but I suspect that slut Ke$ha has something to do with it.

And now it’s made its way from the very cesspool of celebrity stardom to Portland, OR where me and two of my lady friends saw some broad sporting it at Dig a Pony. Of course, right?

We stared at her all night trying to decide if we liked it or not. I came to the conclusion that she looked stupid. Jordan said she liked it cause everything else about the girl was ‘normal’. I maintain that she liked it cause everything else about the girl was 90’s, but I still caught her drift. It wasn’t like she had on full sci-fi Mad Max fashion accessories.

And Jessica, pretty sure she just couldn’t stop staring at the hideous heels on the bitches behind us. They were like, I don’t know, like this maybe? (I was on my second vodka drink by this point)

Anyway, blue lips. Yeah…it’s a thing now again, huh? I kinda wanna try it. It’s so kooky and zany! Except, actually it’s not. I’m just afraid that with my fair skin I might end up looking like Laura Palmer.

But screw it. I aim to please. Especially my readers. So, for Ian Alexander Galloway, I will do this.

Here is some inspiration to draw from. I largely think how my own face turns out looking will largely depend on whatever $0.99 option Wet & Wild offers.

Ok! So watch for that. Me and my blue lips.

I also know I was drunk last night when I wrote about Rachel McAdams, cause I apparently also started a post about Lana Del Rey’s fashion that I don’t remember and that I was too tipsy to finish. Watch for that too.

xoxo, Lou


The Dream of the 90’s

I know. That title is a bit predictable, so sue me. I want to write about 90’s fashion, but first I have to say that your view of the 90’s might be different than my view of the 90’s and then, well there’s the 90’s as we all remember it fashion-wise. I’m sure I can post this picture:

And make half of you squeal in nostalgic delight, but I started the 90’s a little girl wearing stretchy headbands that matched my bulky sweaters, which I wore over leggings (pretty sure the horror of this is why it sticks with me) and ended the 90’s a stoner hoodlum that considered gold chains and chola hoops the height of fashion.

Up here in Portland, I have a healthy amount of young friends that are bringing back the trends my older sisters use to rock. My sisters (33 and 34 respectfully) probably both wanted everything Brenda wore on 90210…or did you want Kelly’s wardrobe? See? I’m too young. I don’t even know. But what I do know is that I have a picture of my super bangin hot homie Jordan (24 … young bitch) wearing almost that exact same Donna dress.

Look at that 90210 picture again. Can you believe David Silver is banging Megan Fox now? WTF.

Dude. Jordan. You are such a Donna. Check out her hat here:

Hahaha, Brenda’s blouse. Holy shit. Reminds me of that Seinfeld episode…the pirate shirt episode. So funny. Dang. You guys actually liked this back then. Kelly’s pants!! Wha??? So good. So, so good. And I laugh, but in 20 years I bet we’ll all be laughing at the clothes we see on Gossip Girl.

What other 90’s trends are cropping up you ask? I’ll allow Miley Cyrus to demonstrate. Miley Cyrus! I’m pretty sure a 20 year old today recycling your own teenage fashion makes you Vintage. Not there’s anything wrong with that. It’s just sort of mind blowing, no?

Grungy flannels and boots? I might even wear that. No. I know I would wear that. But what in the actual fuck is that first outfit? It should have stayed in the 90’s where it belongs. Christ.

Like I said, I was in a different adolescent stage during the 90’s. But what’s weird is I feel like I’m bringing back my own 90’s trends and it’s freaking me out.

Mentioned it earlier, but I thought I was a little badass when I was oh … 14. That would be, 1997. All this picture illustrates is that I actually wore gold chains and Tommy Hilfiger sweatshirts that were 18 sizes too large for me, but I was too lazy to find anything better.

Seriously though, I ran with a crowd of juvenile delinquents. I thought I was hard and yet, JESUS look at my tiny, innocent, non-makeuped face.(No make up was not the norm as evidenced by my yearbook pic below).

Now look at this! A gift from my boyfriend upon hearing about my obsession with gold chains. And I recently stole his gold CASIO because who am I kidding? It’s fucking awesome.

And admittedly, my most recent chola get-up is much better than my junior high attempt, but point is, the obsession still exists even if most days I don’t indulge it, saving it instead for theme kickball teams and the like.

Then… (can you spot me?)

So. Much. Bronzer and Hairspray.


Gold, Gold, Gold!

I don’t know anyone that hates 90’s fashion. In fact, most people either love it in theory, feel completely affectionate toward it, or go full on and wear it every fucking day like they’re “bringing it back”, which fine, yeah, I’m all for it.

I’m bringing back my own 90’s after all and I bet if you aren’t doing that yourself, you’re wishing someone would so you could look at it again and squeeeeee in delight? Amirite?

Go on, tell me about your 90’s fashion obsessions. Or, shock me, and tell me about your 90’s fashion gripes that you wish would just die already (see: Miley Cyrus, above photo).

For better for worse, as my lovely Jordan showcases for us, the dream of the 90’s is indeed alive in Portland and not just cause we’re all a bunch of layabouts. 90’s are Vintage, bitch.